


Chikoon

by Titan_Jaeger



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: So much randomness, a stupid au that shouldn't have existed, about him seeing a deer, and then it somehow led to this story, based on a story, but it did, chicken, chikoon, of lavi, so read it at your own risk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-24
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-28 18:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6339631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Titan_Jaeger/pseuds/Titan_Jaeger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A one-shot that no one should ever, ever read that involves a jungle, Allen's hunger, and chicken. Kinda humor? Total crack for sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chikoon

**Um. Yeah. Thank you Badlydrawn Wisely, Daisya, Lavi, and Kanda for this inspiration. You can find them on tumblr if you want to check them out.**

 

**Uh, enjoy?**

 

* * *

 

"I'm hungry," Allen winced as he trudged through the forest. "And hot."

 

"Shut the hell up and keep moving, beansprout," Kanda grunted and plowed on, using his mighty Mugen to cut down the leaves on the pathway.

 

"The name's Allen, Bakanda."

 

"Aww, beansprout," Lavi said cheerfully, dodging under a branch. He can feel the sweat sliding down his neck and his cheeks heating up from the heat. His orange scarf had been wrapped around his hair like a turban so it can block out the sun. "Cheer up. It could be worse."

 

Kanda snorted. "Yea. Says the one who has a mini shade going on there. Getting lost in a forest with no food and water is a heaven's blessing."

 

"Fine. Be a grump about it," Lavi pouted. He looked around the humid forest.

 

Suddenly, a loud growl was heard that echoed across the jungle.

 

Slowly, Kanda and Lavi turned their heads toward a non-sheepish Allen. Allen placed a hand over the monster of a stomach.

 

"I'm hungry," Allen repeated calmly.

 

Lavi sighed. "We might as well go find some food."

 

"Tch, noisy Beansprout."

 

"It's Allen."

 

The three continued their way through the forest.

 

However, it seemed like the forest was endless. The sun was at its highest peak, causing both Lavi, Kanda, and Allen to be excessively panting and extremely exhausted. Lavi can even see the heat waves rising from the forest floor.

 

It wasn't long before Lavi saw something flash by beside him in the corner of his left eye. Lavi turned his head and stared where he last saw the flash.

 

"Lavi? What're you doin'?" Allen paused, noticing Lavi's halt. Kanda also stopped and stared at the Bookman Junior.

 

Lavi waved his arm at Kanda and Allen's direction, motioning to come closer. "Shhh, I think I saw somethin', Sprout."

 

"What the fuck? You stopped us because you saw something, idiot rabbit?" Kanda growled. "It can be a fucking deer or something."

 

Lavi waved Kanda down to be quiet and took another step forward to the direction where he last saw the flash. Kanda and Allen glanced at each other, then shrugged and continued on their way without Lavi.

 

Lavi peered over the bushes, only to gasp as his visible eye widened in disbelief. There and behold, the source of the flash: a plate of beautiful raw chicken.

 

"DUDE IT'S A RAW CHICKEN BREAST ON THE GROUND!"

 

"Chikoon!?" Allen whipped his head around.

 

**_Crack!_ **

 

Both Lavi and Kanda froze at the sound. It wasn't a long before a soft _fwump_ was followed as Allen laid dead on the ground.

 

Kanda and Lavi stared at the dead exorcist that was now lying on the forest floor.

 

"…"

 

"…"

 

"…You'll be the one reporting this to the Black Order, idiot rabbit."

 

The End.


End file.
